Gift Giving
If you are invited to a wedding, baby shower, bar mitzvah, or
other celebration, it is expected that you will bring a gift. Unless
you know the host very well, the gift should be modest in value, about
$25.
For a wedding, the bride will have "registered" at one or two local
department stores, indicating the items and styling she prefers. You
can buy the couple a gift that isn't listed, but most people buy
something listed on the registry. If you buy an item listed on the
registry, be sure to tell the store that you are doing this, so that
the couple doesn't receive duplicate gifts. For a baby shower, bring
a gift appropriate for a newborn baby. For a bar mitzvah, bring a gift
appropriate for a 13-year-old boy. Bar Mitzvah gifts tend to be more
formal in nature. For example, a gold-plated Cross pen is quite
common. Personalizing the pen by engraving the recipient's full name
will be appreciated.
If you wish to give a gift when you leave to return to your home
country, the best gift is something that is unique to your country. It
does not need to be especially valuable or rare, just reminiscent of
your home. Possibilities include a book about your country, an
inexpensive handicraft or piece of art, or something else that
reflects your culture. If the children collect coins and stamps, they
would be very pleased with a set of your country's coins or a
selection of mint stamps from your country. Items that are common in
your country but difficult to find in the United States are also good.
If you owe a debt of deep gratitude to an American host family, a
common way of repaying it is to take the family to a form of
entertainment, such as a baseball, basketball, or hockey game, the
ballet, or to a good restaurant.
When giving gifts to a business acquaintance, do not give anything of
a personal nature, especially to a woman. Do not give cosmetics. A
scarf is ok, but other types of clothing are not. Something
appropriate for the office is best. But gift giving is not as
important in America as it is in other countries, so there is nothing
wrong with not giving a gift.
If you need help selecting a gift, talk to a salesperson at a
department store. Tell them about the person who will be receiving the
gift and the reason for the gift, and they will help you find
something appropriate and within your budget.